Eating humble pie....

There comes a time in life where, on occasion, you have to man up and admit you were wrong. I HATE such occasions, but this past few days I have to admit I have been utterly slapped down ! :-)

Yesterday, a few of my ww buddies were on twitter, bemoaning the fact that they had only lost 0.5lbs at weight in etc etc.....there ensued a debate which kinda went as follows....




*Top UK PT* Ditch the scales!
*Me* They're fine as PART of your arsenal to measure progress
*Top UK PT* They're inaccurate and many factors affect reading! Go to the loo and then weigh in!
*Me* As long as they're used sensibly and as a controlled experiement then surely they're ok!
*Top UK PT* As you well know they can encourage an unhealthy dependency. Use clothes to measure your progress


This made me think. About how clothes can be JUST as fickle as the scales. You know those old reliable jeans that are your 'go to' ?? Well, on a 'fat' day, they're just as likely to indicate a 'gain' as the the scales are! I then planned a whole chuffing blog post exposing this fact and feeling VERY smug about myself.

And then...........

today is a Bank Holiday here in the UK, so Rich and I decided to go out to play in the beautiful sunshine we've been having. Getting ready, I grabbed a pair of shorts which I was triumphant to 'get bakc into' this time last year, just to see if they fit .......bearing in mind all the b*tching I have been doing of late at myself because I feel like I've gained weight. Tried them on. And below is the result.


















Massively too big. As in can't-wear-them-without-indecent-exposure-too-big.....Error.


See, I've been consistently(unfavourably) comparing my physique to 'this time last May' when, looking back, I felt much more lean and honed and toned, and I WAS LIGHTER ON THE SCALES ! This year, I am heavier.....however, a quick check back through facebook shows me quite clearly WEARING these same shorts on holiday with my girlfriends, cartwheeling along the beach in them, in fact, so they absolutely fitted me and - more to the point - stayed up this tie last year. SO. Moral of the sory is, YES I may be heavier BUT once again the CLOTHEs have proven to be the best gauge of progress, because I am quite clearly smaller tham I was this time last year.














And whilst, in the grand scheme of things, none of this matters one iota, the moral of the story is that I could either be really down about the fact I am heavier (according to scales) than last year and feel sh*t about myself and take a train straight to self pity city and moan about undoing all my hard work and giving in and slacking off and being a crap example etc etc OR I can go with the indisputable evidence of that pair of shorts and feeel all of a sudden on top of the world like I can do ANYTHING and rejoice in the fact that my body HAS changed....seemingly for the better.

SO, in conclusion, I must eat humble pie. The scales are categorically NOT the best measure of progress. In fact they mess with my mind. I knew this....I of all people knew this...but I reeeeeally and truly thought I had a handle on it. Turns out - not so much.

So yet again,Mark, you were right. I will TRY and ignore the scales (again!!!) and continue trying to measure what I deem to be 'progress' in this way. I am totes glad you're in my life ! (annoying though it is to be once again proven wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Ditch the scales people (she admits, begrudgingly !!!!!!!!)

Love Lizzie xoxo

BodyFitBootCamp

Hey peeps,

Soooo....guess what I've been up to?! Getting my very first, bona fide, fitness business venture off the ground THAT'S WHAT!!!!

How good is that?! Check it out here! My friend and mentor, Mr Mark Raynsford is the Director of BodyFitBootCamp in Surrey. I don't know if I ever told you about my little running club that's been operating since January this year, with the aim of helping women who might otherwise be intimidated by gyms and the like, to learn to run in a fun environment, with likeminded people. Well, it's been going great guns but was starting to need something else to develop it. Through various chats on twitter and with Mark, an idea began to take shape of actually turning my running club into a boot camp !

Fast forward a few weeks and here we are !!!!!!!! It's all happened so fast and I am so buzzing! it's GREAT to be doing something I love, motivating people who want to make fat loss and fitness changes in their lives, and getting paid for it!

Our sessions last for about 45 minutes and we work HARD! No equipment, all bodyweight exercises and a bloody good laugh while we're doing it !

I am so grateful to Mark for this opportunity - it's well exciting! I am loving seeing the enthusiasm in the members as they see results and get all passionate about training and eating right. IT IS GREAT !

So that's where I've been ! How we doin, blogland?!

Love Lizzie xoxo

#FoodFail

Bonjour mesdames et messieurs...



Sunday again eh? How DOES that happen?! Quick update.

There's a part of me that is loathe to 'fess up the following to you....but I need to! Just because I am a CBT and future PT doesn't preclude me from slipping.....so here goes.....

I had a truly terrible week last week - food wise. Did not workout one single iota (oh, apart from a mega guilt induced far too long cortisol through the roof run on Monday) and ate utter sh*te all week. Yesterday I went out to Liverpool for a friend's birthday and for the first time since Feb 2010 or thereabouts, I felt reeeeeeallllly uncomfortable in my clothes. Getting ready & picking an outfit was a total nightmare, nothing fitted, or hung right, or looked good. Just like the old days. Cue self-loathing. A week of stress meant troffing pretty much what I liked (so, bread...also cake...also not really cooking properly) and having wine on school nights, and having reeeeally pants sleep and not working out has all taken its toll on my poor little bod.

That feeling of 'uncomfortable' was an odd one. Once so familiar and yet now so alien, it was weird to be back there. A timely reminder though. I hated it. I'm not perfect. I still struggle from time to time. Ok so it's not major binge-eating or the dreaded binge-purge subtype but for me, it's a struggle. And almost certainly stress-related. But I was reminded (again) of what I've changed in my life, where I want to be, and yes the body I still want - as in that whichI am yet to have - and mostly, of how much I DO NOT want ever to go back 'there.'

So, how do you pull yourself out of the hole?

1. TELL SOMEONE - accountability is everything. Choose someone to tell who will not let you get away with it, won't collude with you, will hold you accountable and ask the tough questions, all without judging! Tall order, but we all have those people in our lives. Be honest with them!

2. SET A TIME LIMIT - For me, it was a week. I was knackered. Defences were low. Did not AT ALL feel like working out. So I didn't. Every time I made a less than perfect or out of the norm food choice, I reminded myself that on Saturday this would stop. This helped me to cope in the short term with the damage I was doing and the ensuing guilt. It also mentally prepared me for getting back 'on it' when my time limit ran out.

3. TAKE NOTE - Journal it, tweet it, blog it, - whatever works for you, however you keep track of your thoughts and progress. Record HOW you feel in the midst of an 'off' period, record WHY you're experiencing it (if reasons are known). For me it helped to stop and jot down precisely how I felt when I woke up at 3am with heart burn because I'd eaten pizza at ten o' clock at night! What a div ! When I was fat I used to get that all the time - haven't had it for 2 years...it was a shock to be woken up by it...and then not to be able to sleep for ages, thus waking up knackered and cross, less able to 'cope' with life and less motivated to yank myself out of the hole, more likely to make stupid food choices and steer clear of working out....and then being ensnared in a vicious cycle of the same.....groundhog day anyone?

4. TAKE ACTION - Rather than dwelling on the negative - the above - use it to turn to a positive advantage. As well as noting the HOW and WHY make sure you ACTION PLAN - the WHAT and WHEN ! What will you do to stop? Plan in your next workout - make yourself accountable for that, tell someone your plan. Do a healthy food shop. Get rid of the crap. Don't carry cash when you go past the tempting food places. Make it harder for yourself to give in. Change your route home. Do all of the above! And the 'when' is the time limit spoken about above.

So, for me, this week. I have complied with my time limit. I did a gym free kettlebell workshop in the garden yesterday along with bodyweight workout. I ate healthily and limited my alcohol intake despite a night in town AND a dinner out. A healthy food shop has been done, meals are thought through for the week and workouts factored in.

All in all I'm setting myself up to succeed. Keep me accountable, won't you?

Love Lizzie xoxo

Tiredness SUCKS!

I am currently knackered. A combo of crappy sleep, not enough sleep, doing too much, training too hard and all the stress of the past couple of weeks has taken its toll a bit! It also means I am making reeeeally crappy food choices because I'm tired and therefore less inclined to care, or worry about consequances, so it's hard to be motivated which then perpetuates into a deeeeelightful vicious cycle of eating nonsense. Not a good advert ! SO. From today, I am pulling it back. I took action last night: a self-imposed social media blackout, stopped working and 'doing' at 9pm, ate a properly cooked, sensible dinner, had a bath, slapped on the old trans-dermal magnesium spray, read last Sunday's Times and was fast asleep by 10pm. Awoke before my alarm at 6:40am feeling refreshed and ready to rock! As a result, have been far more productive today AND have clawed it back food wise. Breakfast - half a lemon in hot water, 2 boiled eggs and 2 slices rye toast Mid-morning - grapes, pineapple and almonds Lunch - falafel, hummus, and a big ol' salad with chilli and coriander 2L water by midday and 3 cups peppermint tea. No idea what dinner will be yet but this afternoon I have a banana and a home-made protein bounceball so I can go workout after work. I can't wait ! Energy levels are soaring!!!! Have a great day people! Lizzie xoxo

So.......food !

Let's face it, kinda the raison d'etre for this here blog. You've seen my journey with food...from the not so good early stages to rockin' the ww plan through the weight loss to finally getting to goal and the central theme to all this madness has been food.

Food. Simultaneously my archemeny and BFF. I have always had a nutty relationship with it. Enter WW stage left! For the first time in my life I had something that worked. It encouraged and enabled me to eat healthily, sensibly and without crazy 'weightloss' techniques....and I may as well be honest, the fact that there were rules was one of its biggest appeals...I like control and parameters to work with ! I adapted quickly to the ww way of eating and it suited me down to the ground. The weight started to come off and eventually I got to goal. Remember this was the 2nd time I had done ww. Remember the ill-fated 23lbs lost in 20 weeks attempt of 2006?! Yeh well. Less said about that the better BUT the main difference between my 2009 attempt compared with 2006 was the change in what I ate. 2006 Liz was all about the 100 calorie snack packs, low fat, reduced fat, light, lite, diet coke drinking 18 points a day. The 2009 version saw me trying to eat 'cleaner' - favouring the 'Filling Foods' and even when ww scrapped the Points system and brought out PROpoints in Nov 2010, I was still able to rock it because of their fabulous 'Simply Filling' version of the PROpoints plan.(Like 'Core Plan' for the old school amongst you!) This helped me to begin to move away from counting points every day - I'll admit that going from 18 to 29 each day freaked me out a tad - and I began to ponder on life after ww. The therapist in me wanted to challenge my reliance upon counting and tracking. A perfectly good technique to have and practice and use on a daily basis. BUT does it teach us to change our behaviours and attitudes towards food? Or is it a means of applying a modicum of control to said behaviours and attitudes?

I began thinking about what I wanted after goal. I'd got to a point where I was tracking ever so carefully and eating ever so perfectly during the week and then would go mental each weekend eatign and drinking pretty much what I liked. (Ah, remember the days when a bottle of wine was 7.5 points !! ;-) ). This became a pattern and although I had hit goal and then some, I think that my health was not the driving concern. Weight loss was. I was weighing in every week and riding a wave of 2lbs on, 2lbs off - week in, week out - all within my goal range so for all ww intents and purposes it didnt matter but how I felt was becoming an issue. I was also training like a demon (circa summer 2010) and as such, this was the control mechanism for the crazy weekends. Eat sensibly in the week, track, no bread, no wine etc etc....go bonkers at weekends but "it's ok because I can train like a loon in the week to claw it back, and ensure a weightloss on the scales on Saturday" Damage Limitation diet. In the and my weight hit a plateau and I was knackered because of all the training I was doing with sooooo the wrong fuel in the machine!

Something had to change!

At the beginning of this year I left ww - essentially because of the pt course I'm doing and time factor. This coincided with getting involved with the twitter community I've mentioned previously. As often happens in life, a timely intervention has sent me down a whole new path in life, in many ways, too numerous to mention, but specifically for the purposes of this blog, in terms of food.

January 2011. Operation #ditchthescale. Those 2 PT types (again, aforementioned) whom I have got to know and greatly respect, began a campaign of merciless yet good natured ribbing to get me to ditch the scales. The idea being that I needed to look to body shape and health as a means of gauging progress rather than being fixated with figure on the scale. Not one to back away from a challenge, I embraced it wholeheartedly and went without weighing myself for February. At this time I also discovered this forum which has proven to be a great resource for the 'new direction' I've taken food wise.

So what is it? Well. Let me tell you. Basic premise? "Eat Natural to Look Natural" Well, duh! I hear you, I hear you. But let's think about this for a sec! Even when I first began reading about 'clean eating', I was still very much on the 'sugar free/low fat' vibe, under the impression that because it's lower in fat and/or sugar, it must therefore be healthier. WRONG-O! So what does that mean?

Embrace the good fats.

*Cue mind meltdown*

Here's the lowdown, no point me regurgitating it here, but suffice it to say this has been one hell of a learning curve. The very fact of 'unlearning' all those 'healthy eating' habits has been a huge challenge...never mind the *actual* doing of it!

Some of the highlights include:-

* Ditching low fat hummus, cottage cheese, Greek yoghurt, etc in favour of full fat - You know what? tastes about a million times better AND is better for me. I still have a massively hard time reprogramming my mind to reach for the full fat rather than the low, but it does stand to reason that 200g of full fat hummus and 200g of low fat hummus is still 200g....so, what do they ADD to the lower fat version to make it weigh the same? Answer: Sugar, fillers, artificial sweeteners, in short, all kindsa crap. Frankly, I'd rather go full fat.....*gulp* I can't believe I just said that !

*Ditching the diet coke - I didn't drink this a lot at all...in fact I think Christmas was probs the last time, but I do recall the ww journey first time round I used this a lot to surpress my appetite, under the impression that it was a healthy choice because it was sugar free.

*And related to the above - caffeine - DAMN this was hard ! You know me - I looooove my lattes.....and even though I am a 'grandesingleshotskinnylatte' kinda gal, it's still caffeine and still milk....so I went cold turkey on caffeine's ass for a month. Dear GOD the withdrawal headaches! Remind me never to do any Class A's - I wouldn't be able to cope with the come down ! (JOKE!!). The thing I found hardest was not starting each day with that all important cuppa (English Breakfast Tea just FYI American pals!!) but I have slowly weaned myself off it and now look forward to green tea. I know! MAD! More importantly, I am at the stage of the plan where I can reintroduce certain things, like the odd latte. What I have found is that my taste for it has changed. I don't want it so much anymore and it's taken its rightful place in the 'once in a while' treat drawer!

*Bread - This was a biggie!! I only ever ate bread at weekends, as a treat, but it was always something I soooo looked forward to, would then go crazy with and then be left feeling, well, pregnant with air and. Fact is, wheat and gluten pretty much sucks & it's really hard for our bods to get to grips with it and use it for anything massively worthwhile. So, rye bread it is. I have battled with this....soooooooooooooo an acquired taste!But you know what? It's ok. And it doesn't leave me bloated to high heaven! Same also goes for spelt products like spelt pasta....working on this one, I don't 'do' a lotta carbs, so this is a new challenge!

*Water - Since I bought that Sigg bottle a year or so ago I have been reeeeeally good with hydration levels - knocking back 3 or so litres a day of filtered (not tap) water - so I've just carried this on - but I wanted to mention it here because it's fundamental to what I am trying to achieve. Some have even described it as 'lifeblood'....

*"If it lived or has been grown - eat it!" - The 'catch-all'...suddenly a whole lot more is on the menu than before. All natural, all good for us.

There's loooooads more I could say but I think I'll leave it there for tonight!

Love, Lizzie xoxo

A little perspective.....

This morning on the way to work I was confronted head on with an entirely unpleasant blast from the past. I'll spare you the details of what/when/who/why but suffice it to say the typical reaction for me when faced with this particular occurrence on the mercifully rare occasions it happens, would be one of blind panic, definitely 'flight' rather than 'fight' and more often than not crazy puking and the triggering of major restrictive eating for a while after. Today, however, as I sat on that train, panicking, it suddenly occurred to me that I'm not the same person anymore. "The old has gone...the new has come"...I can choose for myself now, how I react in any given situation. I am not controlled by negative thoughts or behaviours, and certainly not by another individual. I was faced with a choice. In the end, I did get off the train a stop too early. But in a calm, controlled way. Not rushing, or panicking or - I am pleased to report - throwing up ! Squared shoulders, standing tall. A few calming yoga breaths on the short walk to the office and a quick 'mind game' and all was once more right with the world. Furthermore, I sat down at my desk and ate my planned breakfast of strawberries, grapes, banana and apple with porridge oats, almonds and greek yoghurt....no crazy eating patterns for me thank you very much ! POSITIVE CHANGES ! With clients I ask them all the time to practice the technique of being able to recall at a moment's notice 5 things that have changed for the better, or that they are proud of, pleased with, know to be different about themselves - progress points, if you will. Today, confronted with that situation, this little exercise served to strengthen me. It helped me realise what I have achieved: personally, professionally, in life and where I am going, who I am and who I am not any longer! In no particular order... 1) I am confident in who I am 2) I am content with my life in the here and now 3) I am no longer trapped by my own body or mind, by restriction or by being overweight 4) I have done things I never thought myself capable of 5) I am happy So there you go. Give it a try. It really does help! Shift your perspective onto the positives and you can't go far wrong. I tweeted this this morning, hence the blog post.... " @lixwall Sometimes you're faced with an experience you'd rather forget...use it as a marker for how far you've come, how changed you are #positivity " So go on, tell me ! What are your 5 things ! Comment or tweet !

Guess who ????!!!!!!

Hello dear blogland!! It's ME! I am still alive ! Sincere and heartfelt apologies for abandoning you...I didn't mean to take a hiatus! Suffice it to say I have undergone something of a transformation these past few months. In a GOOD way! All part of the plan to be less focused on self and more looking outward. All about the next challenge. The next phase of life. It all began with Twitter, funnily enough! One extremely hungover Sunday morning in January I was idly scrolling through Twitter when I happened upon @inkilterfitness aka Stuart Amory who had set his followers a challenge for January which was not to drink alcohol. I figured it was probs a good idea to get involved and so I did! Over the next few weeks I noticed little motivational tweets from Stu here and there, spurring us all on, encouraging us to stick with the challenge and publish results. This was when the penny dropped as to what twitter is all about! Also during aforementioned hungover Sunday, I was also 'tweeted' by @markpt aka Mark Raynsford who recommended a vile concoction to restore my poor dehydrated body after poisoning it with wine. It worked a treat! So I started following him as well. Cue the beginnings of endless banter, merciless teasing, great friendship and a whole lotta learning! Long story short, there is a pretty amazing pt community firmly establishing itself in twitter land, and with all my aspirations in that direction I am loving all that I am learning from these people. Sometimes in life, connections with people just grab you and impact your life in a myriad of ways. It's weird. But also cool ! So, over the past 2 months I have..... 1. Maintained my weight (and lost a little bit more) and been at my ww goal for a year! yep - 14th Feb was the day! How cool is that ! 2. Made MANY adaptations to the way I eat (more on this later) 3. Changed the way I workout - or at least, I am on the way to changing it! 4. Qualified at the first level of my pt course ! 5. Got myself a mentor for all things pt 6. Made some very exciting connections in the fitness industry and 7. Hatched some very exciting plans for the not too distant future!! So, I'm back and ready to blog ! Thanks for not abandoning me !! Love, Liz xoxo

Twitter.....

.....I've been on it for a while but have only just begun to use it properly! I think I love it even more than facebook!!

Feel free to follow me

@lixwall

www.twitter.com/lixwall

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!

love Lizzie xoxox

A year ago today.......

....I ran my first ever 10k distance! It was on the treadmill at my gym and took me 72 minutes. I was SO PLEASED with myself and absolutely BUZZING that my body could DO THAT!! Guess what? It didn't kill me, I didn't hurt too much afterwards, it was truly amazing! All it did was give me a greater passion for running - shortly after I made the transition to running outside and now I cannot imagine my life without being able to just head out for a run! It was a few weeks before I hit my ww goal too and I am certain the extra push activity-wise contributed to actually getting to goal. AWESOME.

I now run 10k in 50 minutes...and sometimes under! Who knew THAT would happen in a year?!!

When it feels tough and you can't be arsed, have a think back to what you have achieved. We do some pretty amazing things on our individual and combined health and fitness journeys y'know!!

Have a great day!

Love Lizzie xoxoxox

Happy New Year!

Happy 2011 peeps! I realise I am a tad late to the party but it has taken me till now to get back in the swing of things! I am very excited about this new year + as such am not gonna do a massive retrospective on 2010. Suffice it to say that I had a great year of getting to goal, changing my body, dramatically increasing my fitness + above all else getting HEALTHY. I had a massive NSV of appearing on stage half naked and in short I further revolutionised my life and my outlook thereon.

This year is all about being outward looking. I took a year to focus on myself in 2010. Now it's all about putting it out there. For this is the year I will qualify as a pt! Me. A bona fide health + fitness professional! And health is my aim and overriding objective. Not weight loss this year, but continued health and fitness + my own personal aim to be the best me I can be.

I'm really excited! It means lots of changes but rather than freak out it's much easier just to embrace it. More on all that later but I just wanted to check in + say hello!

How you all doing? What's your aim for the year?

Heaps of love

Lizzie xoxoxo
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