Sunday, 31 January 2010
Saturday, 30 January 2010
This is another 2lbs off, people, how very excellent!!!!
*Doin' the happy dance*
I must dash, brunch is ready - I am celebrating this week's loss with poached eggs on toast with wilted spinach and fresh coffee....mmmmmm!!!!
Have a great weekend !!
love love Lizzie xoxo
Thursday, 28 January 2010
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
Item 1 on the agenda: running at night. In the dark. On your own. To do, or not to do? What precautions do I take? Aside from letting someone know where I'm going, expected time back, and taking a key what else should I be doing? I wore my very fetching glow-in-the-dark running top but essentially I was all alone. I got in last night about 9pm after work and needed to clear my head, it was too full of thoughts! The old Lizzie would have got in the bath with a glass o' vino or vegged on her arse in front of the tv, but the new me rather fancied going for a run, a little one (because it wasn't on the actual activity plan for the week- remember Monday?!?!) So I donned my gear and I was off! Never ever thought I'd be that kinda gal, but there you have it!! It was amazing! I just did the circuit round my little village that I've run before with the boys and that is familiar so I didn't have to think too much about where I was going and was fairly close to home. I didn't really feel vulnerable at any point, it was mostly.....invigorating! Haven't been out on my own in sooooo long! I did about half an hour's worth, 2 circuits of my village so about 3 miles. Job's a good'un! So by the time I got back home I was starvacious indeed......and it was 9:30pm or thereabouts!
Which brings me to item #2 on the Agenda for today's post....
- fitting it all in!! I had eaten lunch (salmon and salad with cashews) at about 2pm to help my bod recover from Monday's killer weights AND to tide me over during working till 9pm. So I wasn't hungry particularly at 8pm ish and felt ok when running but then was starving!! I'd planned to make pasta with chicken to eat half last night and the remainder for an early lunch on weds (because I have uni weds afternoon and then it's long run day- treadmill as it turns out, given that it's currently hooning it down). BUT at half 9 at night who the heck wants to eat pasta, let alone bloody well cook it??!! EsPECIaLLY when I had to be in bed early (again, in accordance with my plan!!) Aaaaarrrrgggghhh!!!!! How DO I FIT IT ALL IN!!!! What to do?! Eat cereal for dinner (not the best refuel!) Or go with the pasta?
I made the pasta and ate half, but then had to stay up till 11 but I felt fine this morning, not stuffed and the scale was kind so perhaps I am stressin about nowt?! I dunno!! Help! How do you balance refuelling your body post-workout with. Nutrition and bed times?! Hahaha! I am gonna drive myself insane!!!!
I guess I'll know if the experiment was a success or not if I can run later on this afternoon! If I'm hungry I won't be able to sustain a long distance, if I'm too full and carbed up to the eyeballs,I won't either!!!!!
All input welcome!!!!!!
Monday, 25 January 2010
Had far too much fun on Saturday night and went to bed at 3am (sober!) which meant Sunday was kind of a non-starter. Snaps to my lovely hubby for politely suggesting I do the 5:30pm BodyPump class to redeem the day and, as he put it, ‘start the week right’. What a guy! The endorphins kicked in, I upped the weights in bicep and tricep tracks, just to see if I could do it, and I did!! Still going easy on the leg tracks (squats and lunges) just to be on the safe side injury-wise. I had a good swim and steam too
Just stopping by to post some weekly goals as a reminder to myself to GET IT DONE! A mixed bag this week, trying to focus on ‘self’ as well as just eating and exercise…..little experiment. We shall see!!
- When people comment on my weight loss, I am going to aim to try and see this in the spirit it is intended – i.e. that people care about me and thus not interpret it negatively or as judgement.
- Practice (perfect?!) kneeling on the Swiss Ball – this came from training Friday night. Apparently there’s all sorts of stuff you can do once you have the kneeling part right – how very Cirque du soleil! Just another little challenge to keep me busy!
- Speedwork/Intervals – stick to one long run a week and in between begin speedwork again. I was doing this just before the IT Band debacle and we did a little bit on Friday to test it and all seemed fine - I also need to run at an incline every so often too.
- Go to bed early every night this week – like, at 10pm. I am sooooo tired and it’s beginning to turn me into a right ol’ cross patch so need to sort it out – spare room here I come hahaha!
- Not doing BodyPump AND running 10k in the same evening. Apparently, this is considered ‘overdoing it’.
Activity plans for the week: Idea being that if I plan it I will stick to it and not go overboard.
Monday – speedwork/intervals on treadmill 30 mins, pilates 1 hour, weights at home and more balancing on that freakin ball.
Tuesday – nada – late clients - maybe a little balance and weights in PJ’s in front of the tv!
Weds – long run – preferably outside (weather permitting)
Thurs – (BodyPump) and Yoga plus swim
Fri – PT
Sat – rest
Sun – treadmill run (HIIT) BodyPump and swim
- Eat more ‘proper’ main meals. Does anyone else have this issue? By the time I’ve finished work, worked out and got home and showered it’s practically bed time!!! And the last thing I feel like doing is eating a proper meal.
- Get involved with vegetables a bit more – I may be at risk of getting scurvy J
- Eat carbs on Tuesday night ready for the big run on weds – I have done this the past few weeks and it seems to work – food as fuel, right?!
- Water water water. Nuff said.
Danger points for week:
Friday I am off work to spend it with my mummy & sister for our mummy’s birthday, so we are off out to lunch and shopping. I have swapped my PT session for Friday morning so hopefully I’ll start as I mean to go on. I am sure there will be wine involved in the day but if I’ve begun with a workout I am far less likely to go overboard.
Saturday evening I am going out with the girls for Julie’s bday, there will almost certainly be cocktails involved and champagne I imagine so I will adopt my ‘drink water in between’ tactic. I might even run a bit on Saturday before the event…we’ll see.
So that’s the plan, Stan!!
Have a good day my dears!
Love BFP xoxo
Saturday, 23 January 2010
I am doin' great! At weigh in this morning I lost a further 1.5lbs and hit my 35lbs lost total! So that was good. This means I am now 10 stone 4.5lbs/144.5lbs/65.5kg.
At this point I think that it might get tougher to lose as I seem to remember last time I was this weight (in,like, January 2007) that it got hard and I seemed to stick around 143lbs for ages. This time however, I realise I am working out so much more now and in and educated way, so I figure it'll come off.
I've been thinking about my progress a lot this past week. It's been one of those weeks where people seem to have noticed all of a sudden that I've lost weight and feel they can comment on it. I have worked really hard at being able to say thank you and accept comments or compliments (there was a time when everything in me would have wanted to scream 'Don't look at me!!' - God bless Cognitive Therapy!) and it's great when people notice. I mean, I notice a BIG difference, but it's my body and I obsess about it everyday- other people don't notice, however much we think they do.
What I have noticed though, is a sort of 'negative backlash' concerning my loss of flab...perhaps that's too strong a term, but there seem to be quite a few people telling me to "start maintaining" and don't lose anymore" and "aren't you skinny enough?". Suddenly, every bugger seems to have an opinion and, apparently, the right to voice it! I would never dream of saying anything like that to anyone!! Maybe it's my disordered history talking and colouring my perspective on this, but it just seems so......personal?
The way I see it is this: I'm not there yet. I don't know precisely how I'll know when I'm 'there'. But I will know. I don't think that my 'goal' will be a figure on the scale per se, rather more a feeling...sense of achievement....ability to look in the mirror and like what I see...but it will be informed by a figure, that's for sure. Before you think I've gone all nutso on your asses, I am all too actutely aware of my tendency to go overboard with weight loss, and thus I surround myself with people to whom I am accountable, so that if I start going off the deep-end, they will tell me. This is why I continue to go to WW. This is why I continue to seek the advice and guidance of my PT. There are enough people in my life to rein me in if the need ever arose BUT, more than that, I actaully want to take responsibility for my health - mental and physical! Those 35lbs lost don't solely represent the fat coming off my body, they represent an entire lifestyle change. A complete rethink. A new attitude to mind and body. A renewed comittment to health and longevity. A passion for exercise and to drive and test my body to see what it can do for me. A complete turnaround of the way I eat, what I eat, how I eat it and my attitude to food in and of itself. Food as fuel. Exercise for joy not to offset a calorie deficit.
I want to continue in this vein, not hoist the responsibility for my own health onto my accountability partners. I want to be able to manage it myself. And I am doing. And doing it well. I feel....amazing. And maybe one day soon my head will catch up with what my eyes see in the mirror and translate it as looking amazing too, rather than seeing the flaws still to be corrected.
Chris the PT said to me that one way he gauges whether or not people show signs of exercise bulimia (yeh, I know, it's a real thing apparently - I googled...) is by asking them to rate their progress on a scale of 1 to 10, and to give a score to how likely they feel it is that they will get to their '10' eventually. He said that when people feel they will never get 'there', then this can be an indication of 'trouble at 'mill'.
Of course, as a therapist I make a tricky client because I am so aware of these psychological assessments! I use them a LOT. So it would have been easy to fib and tell him what I thought he'd want to hear BUT I was totally able to be honest....because I DO think I'll get 'there' - there (for me) being (I confess) happy with how my body looks. And to be able to say that with certainty is progress indeed, people!
Working with a trainer is also a good indication to me that I can still afford to lose body fat safely and healthily, because he's calculated my metabolic age and monitors the progress closely. And even good ol' ww 'What's a healthy weight for you?' guidelines say that the minimum weight for my height is 9 st 6lbs/132lbs/59.8kgs - I am 5'8" tall.
So, what I'm trying to say is, it's nice when people notice I'm getting skinnier and more toned. It's great to be able to say thank you and mean it and know that it's true and not have to immediately refute it. ('Thanks for noticing' is my standard response haha). It's great that I am succeeding with it after such a sucky couple of years. But it's NOT massively helpful that everyone seems to be a bloody expert and feels entitled to (a) ask what I weigh and (b) give me unsolicited advice about stopping!!!
To illustrate this rather lengthy waffle (sorry!!), I've added some progress pics.
September 2009 - around 11,11 (165lbs), having already lost 14lbs.
November 2009, around 11 st (154lbs) - 25lbs lost.
Wednesday, 20 January 2010
Today will be different. Today is planned, packed, counted, factored in and I'm raring to go. It's 8am and I'm on the commute, ready to have as good a day as poss. Exercise will commence from 1600 hours, after an afternoon @ college, learning- and the irony does not go unnoticed here- case formulisations for OCD and disordered eating. Before then I have a LOT of work to do, so have a fabulous day everyone.
Keep on truckin' !
Tuesday, 19 January 2010
- My blinkin cycle kicked in again....a mere week after the last time - wtf?
- I couldn't go to the gym last night because I promised 2 of my yummy mummy friends they could use my CostCo membership after work so I didn't get in till 9pm...
- ...which meant I ate really late. Which meant I ate crap. Which meant I got pissed off at myself.
- which meant I was determined to behave myself all day - which I did - but then I worked really late (tll 8pm) and thus the vicious circle of last night is beginning again, so I have turned to blogging as a diversion tactic!
- I was determined to run outside today - I had 2 invitations for company on said run. First one I couldn't make the time, second was wonderful Rachel. We were determined. 8pm came and went. I walked home from the train station in crazy winds and freezatious weather and thus the run did not happen.
I AM SO ANNOYED! WHY AM I SABOTAGING MYSELF!!!!????
I have not worked out for TWO DAYS. This makes me itch. Tomorrow I have simply got to do some exercise. And then I'll be fine. It's nonsensical to worry about 2 missed days. Isn't it? I ran 6 miles Sunday, did and hour's weights and swam 30 lengths. Surely that'll be ok till tomorrow.
God I am obsessive.
Let's find a positive.
Ooh I know! I wore my brand new, one piece swimsuit on Sunday - and actually felt not hideous in it, - and the pool was packed! AND I went in the steam room all by myself!
And obv, running a second 10k on Sunday in 2 minutes LESS than the first time is a bit of a buzz.
Hang in there me, you can do this.....
Ok. I feel better now!
Saturday, 16 January 2010
Friday, 15 January 2010
We did the following (I say 'we', I mean 'ME'!)
10 minute uphill run at 10kph to 'warm up'
15 deep squats
15 jack knife on the SB
lunges with upper body rotation using MB 15 right leg, 15, left
single leg squats on the harness thing that attaches to the ceiling, 15 left leg, 15 right
15 wide row on the harness thingy again
1 minute on spin bike at a climb (standing)
15 shoulder pulses with 3kgs
15 torso rotation thingies on the weights pulley, left and 15 right.
15 side step ups onto box left, 15 x right
15 press ups onto bench standing at an incline
15 tricep dips on bench
15 bicep curls with 10kg bar bell
20 reps with skipping rope (fast)
20 step ups on higher box
repeat step ups
15 x sledge hammer with 5kg MB
15 x 'punch' with 5kg DB left arm, 15x right arm
THAT WAS ONE CIRCUIT.
2 mins rest and then some fast boxing - jabs, hooks and uppercuts, 15 reps repeated on each arm.
Then I did the circuit....AGAIN.
Then 2 mins rest followed by the boxing again.
Then the FINAL circuit. And just to be 'ker-azy', he had me do it backwards which did not sit well with my OCD AT ALL!!!! I swear this guy is trying to cure me as well as train me....
Oh the other thing I forgot to mention, is that each time I completed a circuit, he upped the reps. SO the first time through was 15, the second time 20 reps of everything and then lastly 25 reps.
Suffice it to say I feel that I have most certainly 'worked out'.
If you'll excuse me, I need to go and lie down.
Weigh in tomorrow....I'm too tired to care right now :)
See ya tomorrow
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Lovelove BFP xoxo
Wednesday, 13 January 2010
Please remind me of this post when I'm having a moan about my weight. Right now I'm pretty happy with how I am!!!!!
Yay for running!!!!!
Big Fat Love
Monday, 11 January 2010
Have a great day comrades
Saturday, 9 January 2010
Today @ww weigh in I was 147.5lbs! Which means I have lost 6.5 freakin' lbs this week!!! HAHAHA!!
I KNEW that 6lb gain was a total loada bollocks! There's no WAY I gained that over 2 weeks! And now the scale has righted itself, balance has been restored and all is right with the world....
So, I am half a pound off 'goal' (though I may change my goal for the final time to 140lbs.) and I feel PRETTY FREAKIN AWESOME (to use my favourite Americanism) let me tell you!
I saw my neighbour this morning as I 'walked' (read 'skated') up the road to my meeting. He asked where I was going. I replied 'fat club'. He said, and I quote, 'What are you going there for? You look fantastic!'
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZIN'! WHat a great way to begin the year - lookin' fantastic!! Now I just gotta work on feelin' it!
BIG FAT LOVE and happy weekend
Friday, 8 January 2010
Yes, I entered into the party season on 18th December, full throttle, and did not, it would seem, emerge from said party until January 1st 2010! Those 2 weeks were a whirlwind of seeing friends, family, attending different events – all of which included either eating and/or drinking. I did manage to have a couple of ‘PJ Days’ which was utter bliss!
Unfortunately, we had a death in the family (my aunt) the day before Christmas Day, so that meant things were quite sad for my mum and her mother (who lives with them) but somehow I think that being able to be together as a family made us appreciate the season a lot more. On the down side it meant that we stuck close to home throughout the holidays to be with the family – which meant I spent 3 days at my parents’ eating and drinking and staying up waaaaaaaaaaaaay too late! My siblings each brought their new partners home to ‘meet the fam’ which was fabulous and we have just had such a lovely time!
And now I am back to catching up on your blogs and hopefully trying to get back into the swing of updating mine!!! A hearty well done to all of you who managed to keep blogging through the madness! And WHAT an exciting year it is already! Kerry’s engaged! (Congrats lady!!) Phil’s engaged! (Wahoop!) Caro hit goal (Way to go girl!!), Sally is STILL getting terrorised by Crazy Lou and Jen is getting to be uber famous (yay!!) – and a whole host of other amazing stuff!
I promise that I will spend a good few hours this weekend catching up on your blogs – I’ve missed them!!!
So. In the interest of starting as I mean to go on, allow me to update you on my life from a weight loss (or lack thereof) perspective.
What went well?
FOOD – This year I had what I like to call a ‘tempered’ approach to eating. In previous years I would have used Christmas as an excuse to abandon all self control, this year I was fine. I ate – a lot – don’t get me wrong, but it was all good stuff, and little amounts of everything. I didn’t deprive myself of anything, but I didn’t gorge myself stupid either. This is indeed an NSV my dears! I did not have one single mince pie or any Baileys at all!
ALCOHOL – Throughout the festive season, I managed to drink alcohol most days! However, the age old maxim of ‘for every glass of wine, drink a glass of water’ worked a treat and I am so super happy to report that I survived the entire festive period without one single solitary drunken episode or hangover! WOO HOOOOOOO!!!! It was SUCH a buzz waking up on New Year’s Day and going for an early run with a fuzz free head! (This is the 3rd year in a row I have behaved myself on new Year and it is sooooooo the way forward, for me at least.)
EXERCISE – You may recall from several angry previous posts that I had incurred an injury from completely overdoing it in the exercise department. On Christmas Eve I was officially allowed to try running again – for ten minutes. I cannot describe the excitement with which I was filled upon hearing this news! So I spent a sweaty, glorious, knackering 2 hours in my beloved gym ON CHRISTMAS FLIPPING EVE – only ten mins on the treadmill though – I am determined to be a good patient this time! Running again after 3 weeks was WEIRD! I had decided that my ‘when-I-am-allowed-to-run-again’ anthem would be ‘Dogs Days Are Over’ (Florence and the Machine – amaaaaaaaaaazing running album – you heard it here first Kathleen!!) and I simply cannot describe the joy I felt at jogging a little bit again, albeit at a hobbly pace – sincere and renewed respect for having legs that work, that have recovered quickly and that can be used as I want them to be once more.
Obviously I didn’t hit the gym on Christmas Day, but was back there Boxing Day, felt so good to work out in between all the eating! This too is a full on NSV as in previous years I would have been all “ exercise? On Christmas? WTF?!” and this year I have turned a corner and love it! I went because I wanted to go, not as a means to cancel out calories consumed, but because it is a part of my life now. It also gave me some great mental health time all alone away from talking and laughing and singing and merry making and partying! I didn’t go crazy, upped the running by 5 mins each time on the treadmill. Chris (amazing PT) has given me a ‘remedial’ leg workout programme to strengthen what I now know is the Vastus Medialis Oblique muscles in my knees and to stretch out my IT band, so I have been doing lots of that. I didn’t road run until Saturday Jan 2 when I put in a good 40 mins with my amazing friend (and WW leader) Rachel. Oh we had a glorious time, I really wish I were clever enough with words to be able to convey what I know simply to be unspeakable joy at being able to run. I am not an amazing runner by any means, I am no marathon girl! But to be out there, in the glorious sunshine, with one of my fave people in the world, able to run at pace and not want to keel over and die at the end is pretty bloody fantastic if you ask me! I recall thinking that I want that to be a metaphor for my life this year.
The stupid snow has hampered my exercise efforts somewhat this week. The UK is virtually at a standstill on account of the fact that we are a nation entirely unprepared for ‘adverse weather conditions’ and thus, ‘The Big Freeze’ as it has been dubbed, has meant days off work and also being reeeeally knackered from the effort of trying to walk on thick compacted ice (picture Bambi on the ice) - I am petrified that I will reinjure myself – that would completely piss me right off. I am living in my wellies and pink bobble hat and after the effort of making it home from the train station on the ice in the dark, the LAST thing I want to do is go to the gym. So I made it on Wednesday – and ran a 7k! WOOOO! I honeslty felt like I could have gone one but stopped so as not to do myself a mischief! No point overdoing it again!). Yesterday I took a rest day from running – though I am so pleased to report that there was NO PAIN whatsoever in either my hip or knee - HURRAH! And today, even, I can feel the muscles have worked but it’s not uncomfortable like over the past few weeks….even after running with Rach last Saturday I really thought I’d knackered it again, but it’s been fine – praise the Lord!
What could I have done better?
Umm, not eaten so much?! We had our first weigh in at ww on Saturday and the scales revealed that I have GAINED…..wait for it…..SIX lbs!! SIX!!!
Unbelievable!!!!! Are you KIDDING ME!!! So even with counting points, exercising and eating healthy in between parties and gatherings, I STILL managed to eat myself into oblivion! GOOD GRIEF!!!
Needless to say I was super disappointed! That’s nearly half a stone! Ordinarily I would be able to ‘feel’ such a big gain, certainly from my clothes, but I really didn’t think it would be so big.
Rather than sulk though, I have picked myself up and hopped back on plan. No more bread during the week, no booze and plan, track and exercise. I know what I’m doing, it’s not that hard! I was a teeny tiny pound off my goal, now I have 7 to go, but you can BET I will get there! HELLS YEAH!
What are my goals for 2010?
Get to my weight loss goal then focus less on weight and more on metabolic age and lowering body fat.
Run a 10k. I know this is not a far distance – I was toying with the idea of a half marathon for this year but if the blinkin injury has taught me anything, it’s that I need to pace myself! So a 10k it is! I want to be able to enjoy running this distance comfortably.
Carry on training – I’m on a roll with this now and it’s still so useful and I have much to learn!
Keep being motivated by my amazing and fabulous motivational match up partner/guru Caro !!!
Right, that’s it for now – well done if you read this far! Happy New Year my lovely friends! Can’t wait to see what this new year of fresh challenges goals and achievements will bring!!
Much love to you all
Lizzie aka BFP xoxo