Oops! I did it AGAIN!

How the bloody HELL did I manage to consume 30 points worth of food yesterday!!?? Shock HORROR!

Ok, focus on the positive - at least it's all counted and pointed and I have a realistic idea of what I ate...and thus can do something to counteract the fallout today - this day - a new day!

I feel reflective today - been reading some of my friends' blogs, people who I actually know in real life, and I feel like SUCH a doofus. Why am I whingeing and whining about my weight when people have real, hard stuff going on in their lives to deal with, things which they then blog about so wonderfully and eloquently, honestly! Inferiority complex!! My yakkings on seem so insignificant and pointless in comparison.

But yet, this is where I am at right now. I'm not happy at this weight, looking like this. I'm not happy and haven't been for some time and it's greatly impacted my life in a lot of ways and this is the root factor. I can pretty much deal with anything when I'm happy in myself and (shallow as I am) a big contributing factor to this is, and has always been to a greater or lesser extent, how I feel about my body.

So yeah, feeling slightly stupid for listing food ups and downs BUT it's important to me and hey I'm not forcing you to read it! Haha. All I know is that it's kept me on track and determined like I haven't felt since 2006 when I succeeded at this whole weight loss malarkey.....which reminds me, I may do a photo illustration of the ups and downs of this bonkers journey.


But for now let's 'fess up re. the aforementioned 30 points worth of piggery yesterday.....

So, I was up to 9 and a half points out of 21 after lunch yesterday. I ate at my desk and saved my lunch hour for a swim - 42 lengths in 30 mins which feels like it's not bad going! When I got back to the office I had a WW yoghurt (1/2) and then went to the WW meeting where I am a 'weigher', which I absolutely LOVE! Whilst there I had a bag of ww crisps (1) and a diet coke (0). Got chatting to a very good pal who was feeling a bit down so we popped to the local bar for a 175ml glass of dry white wine each (2) and nattered/moaned to each other for a bit.

When I got home I was determined to cook Cowboy Pie and Wedges for dinner, so I did BUT didn't have any Quorn mince so I used 500g of extra lean beef steak mince - a whacking 25 points! 8 and a half points' worth of potatoes made into ww wedges/chunky chips type thing. Into the cowboy pie went a tin of Branston Baked Beans (5) and then - idiot that I am - I realised I had to put potato on top of the blinkin' Cowboy Pie, when I'd already made 8 and a half points worth into chips - GAH! ERROR!!!!!! After I'd baked the 'pie for a bit, I sprinkled 10g of parmesan over the top which was 1 point (Asda's own, in a green tub - 10g was well enough to cover the top and give it a taste, plus it's really mature cheese so is strong and you don't need a lot - handy hint or WHAT!!??)

So, this meant that the cowboy pie, wedges and green beans had a combined points total of...wait for it (or should tha be 'weight' for it - hahaha!)....43 points!! OMGOMGOMG! I nearly had a panic attack but then chilled the flip out and realised I could divide it by 4 as that's what the recipe was for, 4 people you dummy!!!! So, once I'd stopped my sweating/hyperventilating combo I got the calculator out. 43/4= 10.75, so 11 really.

Add 11 to 9 and a half I had eaten during the day, plus 3 1/2 in between you get 24. After this I completely lost the plot and had 2 further glasses of wine with Mr Husband whilst watching the last 3 episodes of Season 1 of Californication PLUS a WW Black Forest Bar to curb the chocolate craving!!!!!! I turned into an unstoppable eating machine! GOD! So 24 plus 4 plus one and a half PLUS the 1/2 point for milk throughout the day all adds up to a BIG FAT 30!!!!

GOOD GRIEF!

So today I am on nil by mouth to atone for my sins.....just kidding!

So far today I have had :-

1/2 points worth of fresh strawberries and a small banana (1) chopped with a yoghurt on the top (1)

A cup of tea with skim milk and 2 cups of coffee again with skimmed milk (count the milk at the end of the day)

Lunch - 4 ryvitas with laughing cow on (2) and no points soup

And a banana for this afternoon (1)

I was going to have a day off the exercise today BUT I think a swim is most definitely called for this afternoon!!

And before I left this morning I got a 2 and a half point piece of chicken out to defrost which I will tray bake with no point veg and red wine vinegar for a bulky but minimal point dinner!

So today's total SHOULD end up being around 10 points which is kind of all I'm allowed because of yesterday's gluttony....but it's still a reasonable amount of food - at least I'm not starving myself all day!


Anyway....enough of this drivel...

lovelove xxxx