Thursday, 16 September 2010

Thoughts on shorts.... *edited - pics added*

As you will no doubt have gleaned by now, I have a bit of a wonky self image. Mercifully it is lessening but I still have the occasional "wobble" and moments of panic and, so it would seem, some psychological barriers that will bloody well not shift!

One such barrier is, yep, you guessed it, wearing shorts.

I have never been a wearer of shorts. My legs as a kid were like Bambi's (earning me the delightful nickname "knots in cotton"- thanks dad!), when I was dancing they were ok but muscular. One ballet teacher even told me that my legs resembled a male dancer's legs, as opposed to a ballerina's. Nice.

I have this iconic picture of Rich + I in NYC the summer we were 18, posing with the famous skyline behind us. I am wearing shorts. I look bloody awful. And in my mind, that's how I look + will always look in a pair of shorts.

Fast forward to recent times. When I began working with Mr Motivata aka Chris the pt, one things he asked me was what goals did I have in mind? Hilariously, I now know he meant sommat like "to do a triathlon" or "run a 10k". My reply? Apparently with an entirely serious face, I earnestly replied "Jennifer Aniston's arms + Jessica Simpson's legs"

Nowadays. I run regularly and work on my pins a lot. They've slimmed down considerably, but in my mind's eye they are like tree trunks. As such, over the summer I could be seen regularly sweating like a pig (even more so than usual) on my runs, wearing running tights or the bare minimum of a pair of capris.

It got too ridiculous, so I set myself a behavioural challenge: to buy and wear to run in public a pair of running shorts. So, last time I shopped with my mummy + sister I took them to the Nike shop in Liverpool One for moral support + bought some gorgeous retro Nike purple clima cool running shorts. I love them. And I figure I can't see myself while I'm out running (I avoid looking @ shop windows for this express purpose) and I run at pace so people probably don't really notice. I'm fairly anonymous out there.So it's all ok. Hurrah! A triumph! I wore shorts!!

However, I did make a solemn vow NEVER EVER to wear them to the gym. Imagine! There's people I know there! And people scrutinise you there! (I know this because I do the same thing! What?! Don't pretend you don't do it too!! It whiles away hours on the treadmill!!!!! )

So, you can imagine my sheer delight when I got home early yesterday afternoon + decided to nip to the gym prior to my evening rehearsal, only to find every single pair of running leggings in the wash!!!!!

Nooooooooo!!!! #epiclaundryfail

Instead of panicking, the idea occurred to me to wear aforementioned purple shorts to the gym. Yikes!

So I did.

I noticed several things:-

* when I run, my legs do not look all flabby + cellulitey. I can see the muscles in them, all defined!

*when I do loaded lunges, same deal- you can actually see the muscle tone.

* and then, the "light bulb moment".....

BLOODY HELL MY LEGS *are* as honed + toned as Jessica Simpson's!!!!!! (Please understand I'm talkin' the Jessica of 'Dukes' era, not now- poor thing)

Now, all this might sound a bit odd to you, but there's such power in getting past a body hang up. At least I've found it to be so. It's a bit mad to realise that my bod has undergone such a transformation. - similar to when I was a bit mesmerised by my own arms during BodyPump class - my legs are usually covered so it was kinda weird to see them working!


I wrote the above today sitting in a coffee house during lunchtime. It's now 11pm + I'm home after "Beast it Thursday" gym time.. After reflecting on my "shorts thoughts" today, I decided to go the whole hog + wore a pair of teeny tiny gym shorts to do yoga this evening. I was soooooo scared! I didn't want people to think "who's the fat girl in the gym wear" because irrespective of how I look, that is how I feeeeeeeel. So it was something of a challenge-to-self.

I bloody did it. AND furthermore, Sharon aka amazing yoga teacher came up to me in the middle of forward bend and told me my legs look great + if she had them she'd wear little shorts all day every day! Wowsa! What a compliment (she has an amaaaaaazing body!)

So all in all, shorts experiment = total success!

Hurrah for NSV's! That is defo mine for the week! Right now, I'm so jacked up on endorphins, I don't even care about the scale!!! (It'll wear off, don't worry- hahaha)

Right, I'm off to bed to have pre-pt nightmares.....more on that tomorrow!


Lizzie xoxo

The costume!

Yoga shorts!


MB said...

I've had a hang up about my legs since the first thunder thigh comment my brother made when I was a healthy-weight teenager.

You're living the Nair commercial. Who wears short shorts? Lizzie does! Congrats on the NSV!

Kathleen said...

That's so cool! Nothing like getting over a body hangup.

Lisa said...

OMG, what are you talking about?! Your legs are stunning, I'd kill for legs like those lol.
But I know how you feel, my stomach is one of my major dislikes and my goal is to lose enough weight and hopefully tone it enough that eventually I can just wear my leggings and sports bra, with my midriff showing. The day I do that I'll know I'm getting where I want to be!

Anonymous said...

there you are!!!

girl, your legs are smokin' hot. you are rockin' the hell out of that costume!!!!

California Girl! said...

DUDE!!! UR SO HOT!!!!! I'd give anything for those legs!!! :) Follow me at